Last September, I was leaving Los Angeles for a month. The trip was long but very much anticipated. I was returning to New York, the place I call home. I spent 14 years there before I took a leap of faith and fulfilled my dream of moving to California. The plan was to spend a few weeks in New York, fly overseas to see my father, whom I haven’t seen in person for 5 years, come back to New York, make a quick work trip to Boston, then back to New York again, and finally to spend a weekend in Miami celebrating the birthday of one of my closest girlfriends. A lot of destinations to fit in just 4 weeks!
I’ve always loved New York in September. This is when the temperature is finally starting to drop and it’s no longer unbearably hot. The leaves are slowly turning yellow, and there are many fun and exciting art and fashion events happening in the city. What’s not to love? I’ve been living in Los Angeles for 3 years now but spent the full month of September in New York twice. However, this September didn’t turn out to be what I anticipated.
Before my trip, I got my first tattoo — the word “forward” on the inside part of my arm, right below the elbow. It was important for me to do it before flying back to my motherland. I wanted to remind myself of how far I’ve come and all the challenges I had to overcome on my journey. Little did I know that this tattoo would soon have an even more significant meaning.
A lot went wrong on this trip. I was finishing a long, complex project. I was working 12-hour days for weeks at that point, it was getting exhausting. I could feel the burnout quickly approaching. Traveling overseas for 24 hours to spend just a week on a different continent was exhausting. Being there and seeing my dad was rewarding but emotionally difficult due to the intricate family dynamics. And once I landed back on US soil, things kept going the way they weren’t supposed to.
My work meeting in Boston got canceled. All of my personal appointments in New York (the ones that brought me there in the first place) needed to be canceled as well for various reasons. Meanwhile, in LA, my dog’s boarding didn’t go as planned and I had to quickly troubleshoot. It seemed like nothing was going right.
Back in New York, I learned that my company’s 2024 business priorities were shifting and they weren’t aligning with my long-term professional goals. I asked myself where that would leave me and what I need to do now. Needless to say, I knew we needed to part ways because staying was no longer an option that would benefit me in the long run.
This was particularly alarming because I was in the process of scheduling a surgery to take care of a recently discovered health issue — I needed to keep my health insurance. Luckily, my issue wasn’t life-threatening, but it was time-sensitive and needed immediate attention because I was in physical pain.
Everything felt out of place, and I was quickly approaching a total burnout. I was at a breaking point, and when it seemed like nothing else could go wrong, I got the devastating news of a friend in Los Angeles suddenly and tragically taking his own life due to mental health issues. That’s when everything came to the boiling point for me.
I crashed and burned.
This was it. All I could feel was grief, and it was paralyzing. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t think. I was functioning on autopilot, and at that point, I had been surrounded by people 24/7 for weeks. Zero alone time. I couldn’t wait to get back home to Los Angeles but I still had a commitment in Miami. And all I wanted was to go home. I slept 2 hours and took a 7 am flight. My host whose birthday celebration I committed to attending was supportive. She let me talk, she listened, and she provided me with the best accommodations possible. I attended the dinner, skipped out on everything else, and crawled straight to bed. And for the first time in many days, I finally slept for more than just a few hours.
I returned to Los Angeles and was promptly faced with more challenges. There were sudden paperwork issues I didn’t anticipate and that I now needed to resolve and there was a high price tag attached to that. Then there was the funeral… And there was my poor car — broken into in my secured garage the following morning. Reality felt like a never-ending bad dream.
If you don’t make the decision, the decision will be made for you.
A professional change was happening fast and it was needed. I took time off to rest and reset. Thankfully, my employer gave me what I needed the most — the time and the resources to take care of my health and recover. Truthfully, I don’t know how I would have managed without their support.
Overwhelmed with emotions, I didn’t know where to begin. So I began by taking care of me. They say when it rains, it pours and in my case, it was a thunderstorm. The series of unfortunate back-to-back events were hard to handle at once. I looked at my tattoo, looked in the mirror, said to myself “You got this,” and started the process of getting back on my feet.
So how did I navigate the burnout and get back on my feet? By following the 10 steps below.
Step 1 — Disappeared Into My Cave
I strictly limited my communication with friends and family. I simply didn’t have the mental capacity, the energy, and the desire to talk and answer questions. I was saving the last bits of myself for important interactions I couldn’t avoid. At that stage, I was depleted and found it hard to talk to people. It lasted about 2 weeks.
Step 2 — Felt My Feelings
Intricate family dynamics, professional change, loss, health worries, financial pressure… I had to deal with all of it at once. All I could feel was grief and it was overpowering. It was in my body and it was heavy. So I let myself fall apart and feel it all without putting pressure on myself. After 2 weeks of processing everything in silence, I was ready to slowly move forward.
Step 3 — Went on a Solo Staycation and Immersed Myself In Nature
California beaches surrounded by mountains always made me feel at peace. I took my dog and drove to Laguna Beach where I booked myself a nice boutique hotel. I slept, I ate, and I explored nature. I sat on the beach for hours journaling and watching the waves. I replaced music I normally listen to with binaural beats and had these sets on repeat for hours, reading and meditating to them.
Step 4 — Rediscovered My Authentic Code
I knew I needed to start fresh, so I listened to myself, and my meditations helped me remember what it was that brought me joy in the past. And it was everything creative — writing, graphic design, branding. Journaling seemed to help A LOT, so I continued writing. I used to do it more when I was younger and always enjoyed the creative expression it gave me. Creativity had been missing from my professional life for a while, and only now did I understand how much it was affecting the way I felt. It was time to reinvent myself.
Step 5 —Paid Attention to the Signs From The Universe
I was walking my dog and saw an OOH billboard for Jay Shetty’s class “Navigating Change” on MasterClass around the corner from my apartment. I had a subscription and felt like this was something I needed to watch. Jay covered the “necessary change” that’s hard but will benefit one in the long run (e.g. a career change that’s hard but needed) and a “sudden unexpected change” (e.g. ending a relationship or losing a loved one) that happened to you.
It felt like Jay was speaking to me personally and guiding me through the process.
Step 6 — Tapped Into My Passions and Started Learning
I knew I needed to tap into my passions and start learning again. I explored what else MasterClass had to offer and watched classes on personal branding, career, and entrepreneurship. Once I was done with MasterClass, I tapped into design tutorials. I learned Canva, I learned Wix, and built my portfolio site. I went down memory lane, reliving all the creative and fulfilling projects I worked on, and it felt so good! I put together a mind map on Miro and now I had a plan. I did more for myself during that month than I did in the last year!
Step 7 — Started Networking Again
At that point, it had been a little over a month. I was feeling better and was ready to network again. I began reaching out to entrepreneurs I knew and asking them to meet with me. Everyone I reached out to responded and wanted to talk. Los Angeles is great this way because you can casually meet somebody for a hike or coffee at 8 am to discuss potential business opportunities. New York is more formal when it comes to that, and all your meetings will likely be late in the day and will include alcohol. The last thing I wanted to do was to go to a bar and drink.
Step 8 — Said No to Distractions
As I was reestablishing myself, I had to stay focused. I started saying no to things that were distractions — girls' dinners, drinks, etc. I caught up and socialized with friends on hikes, at wellness studios, and in yoga classes. Every time I got an invitation, I asked myself — would I be gaining something from this experience, or would it take something away from me? And if the experience was only going to take away from me, I would say no to it and stay home reading, writing, and educating myself.
Step 9 — Stayed Active and Stayed Mindful
I needed to keep my body moving and keep my mind still. I continued with my wellness practice, which included yoga, infrared sauna, cryo, flotation, and meditation. I tried to stay as consistent as possible because small daily actions build a routine and lead to bigger actions. I started planning my days the night before and writing my “Top 3” for the next day on a post-it. I kept doing it every night so that I had some sort of structure to my days.
Step 10 — Kept Faith and Continued Moving Forward
I was doing the best I could to continue moving forward and focused only on what I could control — how actively I was pursuing new job leads. The rest was up to faith. It was the holiday season, and things were slow. The layoffs were still happening across all industries and everyone was feeling the pressure. I knew I had to wait until the next year to continue my search for a new opportunity.
January came, and I finally had my surgery.
That was behind me now, but I still needed to find a new job. And as financial pressure started to build up, there was a breakthrough. I was approached by a company in the functional beverage space that needed a marketing director to lead their rebrand and GTM strategy. This was right up my alley and it was a creative project I was looking for. We talked and very quickly I got an offer from them which I accepted. They wanted me to start in 2 weeks.
And finally, things started to turn around…
Final Thoughts
When we are faced with difficult situations, it might be hard to process them in the beginning. There will be all sorts of emotions running through you: anxiety, sadness, anger, grief. Take a break, disappear. Feel them, live them, let them go. Know that things will get back to normal, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time. Keep that as your north star and don’t question it.
The meaning is not in the situation itself; the meaning is in what happens next and what you do about it.
Take a mental inventory and learn your lessons. Is there anything you could have done differently? What will you do differently if you find yourself in a similar situation in the future?
Take those lessons and apply them across all areas of our life. Turn your pain into your fuel. Light it up and use it to skyrocket from your personal rock bottom. Rediscover yourself. Connect to your authenticity and things will fall into place. Keep your faith and always move forward. I’m ending this story with a quote by Mooji, a Jamaican author and spiritual teacher:
“Step into the fire of self-discovery. This fire will not burn you; it will only burn what you are not.”
In retrospect, the dots connect.
